Da Black Whole

Sunday, May 08, 2005

GO MONKEY GO!!!!

http://news.yahoo.com/news?tmpl=story&u=/ap/20050508/ap_on_fe_st/monkey_island_escape

Monkey Escapes From S.C. Island Laboratory


Sun May 8, 6:43 PM ET

BEAUFORT, S.C. - An escapee from Morgan Island has been captured in a tree in the backyard of a home on Lady's Island — about 7 miles away from where he was supposed to be.

"Lady's Island"???

LOL!!

most folks just call it "Earth"


The 10-year-old, 20-pound male rhesus monkey was first noticed as missing from the island April 30, the same time residents of Coosaw and Lady's islands reported seeing him. Some residents were concerned the animal might carry an infectious disease because Morgan Island houses primates used in government research.

ONE MONKEY terrifies these people?

shitfire, poor leetle guy would be more likely to catch something nasty from THEM!

no doubt he's an EVILDOER, tho, and the pristine residents can't be too careful about Securing The Homeland



Alpha Genesis officials said they can't explain how the monkey managed to leave the island laboratory and make its way across Parrot Creek.

all them fancy gubbermint noggins put together, and they can't figure how one "lower primate" escaped their clutches!

hey, "Alphas": here's a clue: MOTIVATION


p.s. -- sounds like you've got some competition for "alpha" status


"I have been here eight years and this is the first (escape) I can remember in the area," said Greg Westergaard, president and chief executive officer of Alpha Genesis. "I'm at a loss at how it got over there. They probably can swim a little bit, but it really is a long way over there."

The monkeys have been on the island since 1979 and are the property of the Food and Drug Administration' name=c1> SEARCHNews News Photos Images Web' name=c3> Food and Drug Administration. They are used in defense and vaccine development studies.

yah, i'll bet they are

and oh, btw -- he ain't YOUR "property," and before this Show is over, you are going to learn it


The escaped monkey was caught Tuesday, Westergaard said. "I'm sure he wanted to get back but couldn't figure out how," he said.

o my god in hevvun . . .

you're "sure he wanted to get back" ?!?!?!

LOL!!!!!!!!

yo Greg, tell true now: you're a Quota Hire, yes?

he was fucking FLEEING from you and your fellow Experimentors!!!

sure Greggie, i'll bet he was sitting in Starbucks there on Lady Island, scritchin' his wee shaved head, just frantic with frustration at how to return to your Team


But the escapee won't be going back to the 400-acres colony on Morgan Island. Instead, he'll probably be taken to one of two breeding facilities in Yemassee or Early Branch, Westergaard said.

see? initiative pays! obviously he's a cut above the rest

in the Planetary Interest, Greggie, i think ya otta save him for yerself, and breed him with your wife


at least he's got a healthy thirst for freedom, which is more than i can say for the "residents" of , uh, "Lady's Island"


Westergaard said it was unlikely the monkey would have a disease because the research performed on the animals isn't done at the island. The monkeys also go through physical examinations four times a year to make sure they are healthy and carry no diseases, he said.

"This monkey's in great shape," he said.

He said there are no artificial barriers keeping the monkeys on the island other than the water surrounding it, as they tend to be social creatures and stay with other monkeys.

"I don't know what happened to this guy," Westergaard said.

[sigh]

ok, i give up, i'm officially washing my hands of our species . . .

3 Comments:

  • out smarted by a monkey? they are dumb ass. make greg wacth planet of the apes, he won't sleep for days!

    By Blogger Gome, At 11:09 PM  

  • Mojo JoJo! [how you go?!]
    Go monkey, go!
    Run buffalo, run!
    Siegried & Roy kitty chow!
    Chimp finger sandwiches in Cali-for-nyah!
    Tell us, oh tell us!
    What Can It Mean?

    There was green alligators and long-necked geese
    Some humpty backed camels and some chimpanzees
    Some cats and rats and elephants, but sure as you're born
    The loveliest of all was the unicorn~

    The Lord seen some sinning and it gave Him pain
    And He says, "Stand back, I'm going to make it rain"
    He says, "Hey brother Noah! I'll tell you what to do
    Build me a floating zoo,
    and take some of those...

    Green alligators and long-necked geese
    Some humpty backed camels and some chimpanzees
    Some cats and rats and elephants, but sure as you're born
    Don't you forget My unicorns

    Old Noah was there to answer the call
    He finished up making the ark just as the rain started to fall,
    He marched out the animals two by two
    And he called out as they came through
    Hey Lord,

    [etc. until the Unicorn was the last one seen on the Roq]
    [Written by Shel Silverstein for the Irish Rovers]
    [New Lyrics]
    Now you might think this is the ending to the song,
    But I'll have to tell you friends that in fact you're wrong.
    You see, Unicorns are magical, so when the rain started pouring,
    They grew themselves some wings and they took to soaring.

    You'll see green alligators and long-necked geese
    Some humpty backed camels and some chimpanzees
    But if you're looking for the unicorns, don't be forlorn,
    The second star to the right and straight on until morning.

    By Blogger Annie, At 5:14 AM  

  • Part II ~ Tell Us, Oh Tell Us

    http://www.tearsofllorona.com/bears.html

    Wildlife in Our Faces and Places:
    What Are These Invaders Trying to Tell Us?

    Paul Shepard compared animal behavior to “a gesture or a speaking,” a dealing in poetic metaphors. But dream symbols are metaphors too, stemming from the imagistic language of the unconscious psyche. What would happen, then, if, seized by a culturally uncharacteristic audacity, we interpreted unusual incidents like bears wandering into hospital rooms as symbols—metaphors, signals, symptoms, even enticements--from an untranslated language similar to that of the dream? And what if not only its creatures, but the breathing world we savage and pollute speaks to us all the time even though our industrial-sized prejudices (matter is dead; psyche is stuck in human brains; humans are the summit of Creation; consciousness is required for meaning to emerge) prevent us from recognizing this speech as such and pausing long enough to make sense of it?

    To try this out on the bears and ERs:

    It is highly significant, startlingly so, that Louisa Willcox of the Sierra Club’s grizzly bear team refers to the proposed mining of silver and copper at Rock Creek mine, Montana, in these terms: "This is an emergency-room situation in terms of grizzly bears….Most experts who have looked at this proposal say this is a nail in the coffin for this population." Indeed. See what happens when once we strip off our biases and ask: what are the bears trying to tell us, faced as they are by the largest mass extinction in history, but lacking a human brain filled with human language? Perhaps they are telling us--through instinctive enactments rather than words deliberated in a neocortex--that as a species they are not headed toward the emergency room, they are in it.

    By Blogger Annie, At 8:37 AM  

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